Not Everything is Discipleship
“How are you discipling students in your ministry?”
That’s a good question, and, to be perfectly honest, it’s one I often struggled to answer as a youth pastor. I’d often point to meeting with students at Starbucks, or to the time I invested in preparing to teach, or to the importance of supporting parents in their family discipleship efforts at home. Those are all good things, but I always had a nagging fear that my discipleship efforts fell short.
Over the past few years, many pastors, like myself, have been cautious about equating discipleship with education or instruction. Rather than view discipleship as a rigid education plan, we started to treat all ministry as discipleship in order to recognize the pastoral and relational side of discipleship. But in doing this, I’m concerned that we actually lost sight of intentional discipleship.
Am I projecting my own failures and struggles onto others? Perhaps. But it’s a pattern that I’ve widely observed, and raising this concern is frequently met with defensiveness that proves my point.
What is Discipleship?
As tempting as it may be to develop our own definitions for discipleship, it’s better to study what the Bible say about discipleship. Here are a few key verses from the gospels that highlight the nature of discipleship.
“A disciple is not above his teacher, or a slave above his master. It is enough for a disciple to become like his teacher and a slave like his master.” (Matthew 10:24–25)
“Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple.” (Luke 14:27)
“My Father is glorified by this: that you produce much fruit and prove to be my disciples.” (John 15:8)
When surveying what the Bible says about discipleship, it’s important to remember the root word for disciple means “learner” or “student.” This is reflected in the way the root (in italics below) is used in the Epistles.
“Do what you have learned and received and heard from me, and seen in me, and the God of peace will be with you.” (Philippians 4:9)
“But as for you, continue in what you have learned and firmly believed. You know those who taught you,” (2 Timothy 3:14)
A disciple wants to do more than learn from their master; they want to become like them. The type of learning and formation involves the whole person (head, heart, hands), not merely their intellect. If you want to explore the biblical definitions and descriptions of discipleship further, I’d suggest Michael Wilkins’ book, Following the Master (yes, it’s an old book with a bad cover, but it’s a valuable exploration of discipleship throughout Scripture).
This is why I’m prone to believe you cannot disciple someone who doesn’t want to be discipled. You can (and should) minister to them in meaningful ways, but you cannot disciple someone who doesn’t want to become more like Jesus.
On Ministry and Discipleship
The distinction between ministry and discipleship has been on my mind because of an article I wrote for the Rooted Ministry, What Does Relational Discipleship Look Like? If you want to know what this looks like in practice, then go read it since I outline what relational discipleship looks like in various ministry settings. I also suggest the following definition for Christian discipleship: “the intentional pursuit of Christlikeness.”
Disciples want to become like their master; thus, Christian disciples want to become like Jesus. Students who are spiritually apathetic or uninterested, therefore, aren’t yet on the pathway of discipleship. Youth workers are called to minister to them, to love them, and to share the gospel with these students. We cheer them on at their games and activities, remember their Starbucks order, and learn the names of their friends and family members. But we aren’t (yet) discipling them, because discipleship is a process that begins with the disciple’s intention to grow in Christlikeness.
Ministry is much broader than discipleship. It encompasses the whole work of the minister: administration, communication, counseling, teaching, evangelism, and obviously discipleship. Ministry is essential and meaningful. Not everything that’s ministry should be called discipleship, even if it does enable or fuel discipleship. In this regard, it’s valuable to have a ministry philosophy that’s broad and robust enough to see how all ministry empowers discipleship, while retaining focus on intentional discipleship efforts.
Why This Distinction Matters
When you try to disciple students who don’t want to become more like Jesus, it will leave you feeling frustrated by their spiritual apathy, which can ironically discourage you from prioritizing discipleship with those who are hungry. This is unhelpful and unwise for many reasons, but most of all, it’s unloving. Instead of burdening these students with expectations they never agreed to, allow this distinction to free you to minister to non-Christian or apathetic students in a way that embodies the patient love of Christ to them, prayerfully seeking the Lord to lead them into spiritual curiosity.
A clearer definition of discipleship will also enable you to see which students are hungry and ready to be discipled. Sometimes, those who are spiritually hungry are overlooked because they’re not as needy. Recognizing the difference between ministry and discipleship can to a fantastic motivator to recommit yourself to student discipleship this school-year.
Minister to youth. Disciple them, too. Knowing the difference will help you do both.
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